10 Harmful Things Wise Parents Still Let Their Children Do
We can easily come across the adult rules set out to ban children. Are those stereotypes true? In order to raise an adult child, parents must always try to find the balance between allowing their children to develop freely with the rules of life.
Parents are not always right and imposing an adult’s point of view on their children, asking them to follow their rules can sometimes be counterproductive, causing stress in life. Bright Side has gathered expert knowledge and knowledgeable parent experiences about things we shouldn’t ban our children.
- Prohibit children to tear, dirty clothes
Unfortunately for parents in this situation, the best way for children to learn about the outside world is to run and explore their surroundings. Of course, at these times, kids will forget how much their clothes cost, as well as the brand on the t-shirt labels they made when they rolled on the grass.
If you’re angry at having to throw away expensive clothes that your kids can’t wear anymore, it’s probably better to divide your child’s wardrobe into one for outing and one for important events.
- Prohibit snacking children
To be honest: almost every child loves junk food – all salty snacks, greasy donuts and sweets will leave a sticky mark on their hands, then they will go all over the house and touch everything around. When parents forbid children to eat these foods, it becomes a taboo in their minds and they will sneakily eat as soon as the opportunity arises.
Therefore, experts recommend that parents sometimes buy snacks for their children to understand that they can have a packet of potato chips at home without having to hurry and eat the whole bag. Moreover, children will not think of hiding a bag of candy to secretly eat.
- Prohibit children from spending money on useless things
According to a survey, children today often spend personal money to hang out with friends, buy or download apps, buy toys, clothes or shoes, as well as buy food or pay for shipping. . Many parents think it is a waste to spend money on useless things, so they often try to limit children from buying unnecessary things by banning and advising.
However, in practice parents should not do this for the following reason:
- · First of all, once you give your child money, it becomes their property. And it is up to them to decide what to spend this money on. This is especially important in families where young children are paid for household chores.
- · Second, this spending can be helpful for a child when they spend money on nonsense and then regret it. This way they will learn to control their spending and distinguish between immediate preferences and really important needs and wants.
- Children are prohibited from rest and play
Psychologists are really afraid that children today have become much more worried, tired and depressed than previous generations. Part of this is in fact many children have to participate in achievement ‘races’. Besides, the school curriculum is increasingly difficult, the volume of homework is much, the pressure from teachers, parents, puts children under great pressure, causing psychological instability.
That is why a modern child needs nothing to do. If your child has free time, give him / her a little space, do not push, impose children on the principles set by adults.
That is why a child today truly aspires to do nothing. If your child’s schedule is empty, don’t rush to fill it with new tasks. Sometimes having nothing to do, being a little lazy is also a happy thing for children.
- Children are prohibited from attending school
Sometimes we can even create free time for children, especially when we realize they are depressed or stressed. Good academic achievement is not important, it is important that students are mentally and mentally healthy while having too much schoolwork.
If you find your child needs a break, give him a chance to slow down and listen to himself: What do you want? What do you like to do? What are you dreaming about? Because sometimes it is even difficult for parents to have time and alertness to find answers to such simple questions in the whirlpool of life.
- Children are prohibited from arguing with adults
This kind of ban can become dangerous for young children. Because it is important for them to know that not all adults are good and not all of their requirements must be fulfilled immediately.
For older children, it will be ethical. The fact is that wisdom and fairness do not always come from the elders. Sometimes an older person may be mistaken or behave in an impolite manner. In these situations, it is important to teach children how to defend their own ideas and know how to limit themselves. Adults need to teach them to do so without arguing, teasing, or insulting (of course, it would be better if they could do it themselves).
If you think you have lost control of your children because they have started arguing you too often, just remember that debate is a fight that starts on both sides, not just from one person. And then show your child an example of a more aggressive approach by turning debate into a compromise negotiation.
- Children are prohibited from choosing their own clothes
Many parents have experienced so much anger that their eyes “twitched” when shopping with their children. And it’s not just because of the price or the endless choices and controversy, but also the fact that they disagree with what their children like. Psychologists have given advice that parents need to stay calm. After all, you are not the one who will wear those acidic jeans or hoodie.
It is better to let your child choose for the following two reasons:
- · In this way, a child develops his own personality. Children will work based on their individuality and find their place in society.
- · The second reason is more realistic – your children will wear those clothes instead of storing them deep in the closet without ever touching them. In addition, children will wear them without arguing every morning with grimaces.
- Children are not allowed to disobey
Many parents are familiar with the saying “children do not listen”. First of all, this seems to be of no use but to make parents with constant headaches. But try to imagine the opposite situation. You have a child who obeys himself and does everything he is asked to do.
This child will develop into a mature adult without the opportunity to protect his or her own interests. And trust us, the bad people around will rejoice in taking advantage of this child’s character.
Of course, raising children who are disobedient is a difficult task, but this will help them develop into confident, ready-to-act adults, instead of being bound by prejudices and only daring. thinking “I can’t do that”.
- Children do naive things
Psychologists say children are tending to grow up too quickly. This is actually not surprising, when children are in a world where they always hear things like “you are no longer a child”, “what you are doing is not too childish huh ? ” or “when will you grow up?” from his parents.
Children will not be able to naturally develop mentally because someone’s designations are as easy as clicks – then they can pretend to be adults, but they are not prepared yet. for the difficulties that adulthood will face.
If your children still have a childish personality and their childhood interests, there’s no reason to force them to give up. Let your children develop at their own pace.
- Prohibit children from playing games
Some games come from the basic concept of education and learning, where children need to solve math exercises to get to the next level.
“Some older children want to play baseball all day, but I want to play video games. It’s sad because my parents always thought I destroyed my brain because of my love of video games. So I was only allowed to play games for an hour before dinner. But it just seems to make me want to play more, ”which is why Chris Bergman, the chief executive of a major software company, creates game applications.
He also confessed that he did not prevent the children from playing games on computers and phones and believed that they maintained a calm attitude while playing.
Studies have found that video games can be more useful for children’s brain development than watching TV. All because the game teaches their brains to react and read information faster. This skill will be useful for children as they grow up and live in an advanced technology environment that is even more developed than it is now.
Basic Baby Bottle & Nipples Do’s and Don’ts
Even if you are going to breastfeed your baby, you will need baby bottle for pumped breast milk or formula. While color and styles abound, you should find baby bottles that don’t cause excessive spit-up, burping and gas. The baby bottle should also be easy for your baby to hold and for you to clean.
You may choose from standard, angle-neck, disposable (drop-ins), and the natural flow baby bottles. Bottles shaped like animals, cartoon characters, etc, are usually hard to clean. Baby bottles and nipples are constantly being improved to reduce the chance of a baby’s ingesting air bubbles, which may contribute to colic, spitting up, burping, and gas and the negative effect of suction, fluid in the ear. Most baby bottles are made of clear or semitransparent dishwasher safe polypropylene or polycarbonate plastic and glass bottles.
- Wash your hands before preparing your baby’s bottle.
- Let someone else introduce your baby to the bottle at about four weeks into your nursing regiment if you’re breast-feeding but want to begin using a bottle. Your baby may associate mom with breast-feeding and may resist if you try to give them the bottle yourself.
- Sterilize your bottle by washing them in the top rack of the dishwasher, or wash bottles in hot tap water with dish washing detergent and rinse them in hot tap water. If you have well water or non chlorinated water, or if you simply don’t run your dishwasher very often, use a sterilizer or boil bottles in water for 5 to 10 minutes.
- Wean your baby from a bottle by 12 months of age, if possible. By this time your baby will be ready to drink from a sippy cup. Prolonged bottles use (after 14 months) can cause your baby to consume too much milk and not enough food, and may delay the development of feeding skills. It can also lead to baby-bottle tooth decay, which is painful, difficult to treat, and can cause problems for permanent teeth.
- Before using the bottle, nipples and accessories the first time boil according to the manufacturer’s instructions-usually five minutes. After each use, wash nipples and accessories in hot soapy water for about a minute and rinse thoroughly. Silicone nipples are dishwasher safe (top rack only). It is also a good idea to boil nipples and accessories once a week for five minutes Inspect regularly , especially when your baby is teething. At the first indication of ripping, cracking, stickiness, or other indicators of excessive wear, replace the nipple for safety.
- Do not heat formula or breast milk in the microwave.
- Do not give your baby’s bottle of milk or formula to suck on during the night or at nap time. The habit can cause baby-bottle tooth decay. Give you baby a bottle only at feeding times and don’t mix bottles and bed.
- Do not prop up your baby with a bottle Choking, ear infections, and teeth decay are among risks of self-feeding, as well as a lack of snuggling and human touch, which all newborns desire.
- Do not give your baby a bottle to carry around and “nurse.” This can lead to tooth decay, drinking too much milk, and sharing bottles with little friends, increasing the risk of colds and other infections. The contents of the bottle can spoil, which can cause food-borne illness, such as bad tummy bugs, which are no fun for your baby or for you.
- Do not try to enlarge a nipple hole with a pin. This could cause the nipple to tear and become a choking hazard .
The bottle you choose is important, but sometimes the nipple, rather than the bottle makes all the difference to your baby. Most nipples are made of Latex or silicone. Only buy clear or brightly colored silicone nipples, not brownish ones. Experts think silicone is safer than Latex, since babies may develop a sensitivity or allergy to Latex. Silicone is clear, odorless, tasteless, and heat-resistant. Because silicone is less porous than latex, it may be better at repelling germs, which may settle into any rough substance.
Happy Baby Feeding!
How to Talk About Personal Hygiene with Your Tweens
How to Talk About Personal Hygiene with Your Tweens
Tweens have a lot going on in their lives. We have burdened them with all sorts of new, unreasonable personal hygiene demands, such as daily showering, when puberty begins, their bodies change, their voices may change, and now we have saddled them with all sorts of new, ridiculous obligations, such as daily showering. Personal hygiene can be a sensitive subject for pre-teens, but there are methods to approach it so that the shift goes more smoothly and quickly without causing humiliation or shame.
- Treat them with care.
You’ve probably already discussed puberty with them, as well as the changes their bodies are undergoing and how they need to do more to stay in shape. You may have even mentioned to them that they must shower at least once a day (or near to it) or they will begin to stink.
In fact, they could already be stinking! When the stink is so strong to you, how can they not smell themselves?! Why is it such a huge deal for them to let water contact their bodies for 10 minutes once a day? They whine about bathing a lot more than they actually shower!
I understand. Believe me when I say that I am well aware of the situation. But it is a significant change, and it takes time for Personal hygiene activities like showering, face cleaning, and deodorant application to become embedded in one’s daily routine. Besides, these aren’t the joyful, lively showers they remember from their childhood; showering is a job. It’s also simple to forget to apply deodorant when you’ve gone your entire life without doing so.
When it’s time to bring up the subject of their cleanliness (or lack thereof), do it privately rather than in front of others. Embarrassing them by discussing it in front of a friend or sibling will not assist them. Select a moment when you will have their full attention.
A vehicle trip is a wonderful time to discuss it since you have one-on-one time with them but they don’t have to make eye contact (just don’t try to talk about it just before or after school—they won’t be in the mood).
- Start with the fundamentals.
Pre-teens aren’t going to suddenly understand how often they should wash or how to care for their skin. You might offer to teach them how to handle their personal hygiene as an adult now that they’re on their path to being a young adult. Because everyone’s skin is different and may react differently to different products, their physician can provide some specific instructions and recommendations, but here are some general rules to follow.
Until they reach adolescence, younger elementary-aged children do not need to bathe or shower every day. However, once they do, showering every day (or every other day, at the very least) will become essential, especially after engaging in strenuous activities. Teach them to touch the armpits, genitals, and feet, among other essential body areas.
They should also wash their hair at least every other day to keep it from becoming too oily, which can lead to acne outbreaks. And now is the time to get into the habit of cleaning their face with a mild cleanser 1-2 times each day (no scrubbing).
Puberty bestows numerous gifts upon us, the most notable of which is a chemical alteration in our perspiration that causes it to stink. Quite a bit. If regular, thorough bathing isn’t enough to keep body odor at bay, a deodorant that conceals the odor or an antiperspirant that helps halt sweat may be necessary.
Which one you select may be determined by how active your child is, how much they sweat, and how comfortable you are with each product’s components. Very Well Family explains it this way:
Some individuals are concerned about antiperspirant’s aluminum content, which has been linked to Alzheimer’s disease and breast cancer, but studies have shown that wearing aluminum-containing products on your skin poses no danger. 6 Because aluminum salts are the only component shown to reduce moisture and authorized by the Food and Drug Administration, deodorant is your best choice for remaining dry if you’re concerned about the contents of antiperspirants. Consider a natural deodorant if you’re concerned about phthalates (ingredients that make goods cling to your skin) and parabens (preservatives) in deodorant, which may interfere with hormones.
They should be used to this by now, but it’s still vital that older children brush twice a day and floss once a day. Gingivitis, cavities, and poor breath can all result from skipping this job, and who wants any of that?
Clothes that are clean
They used to be able to go a couple of days without changing their shirt, socks, or underwear (or longer). It’s possible you didn’t even notice! You’re noticing now, aren’t you? Tell your children that in addition to washing their bodies every day, they should also choose a new outfit every day.
Keep an eye on your fingernails and toenails. To avoid ingrown nails, show them how to cut them straight across (and then gently rounded at the edges using a nail clipper or nail file). This should be done once or twice a week.
If your child is starting to wear cosmetics, remind them not to share it with their peers. Bacteria from the eyes and mouth can be spread through all of those little brushes. (You may also mention that wearing too much makeup might block pores.)
- Allow them to choose their own products.
Your grown-up deodorants and soaps aren’t cool. Their colors and packaging are dull, and they’re aimed at you, a similarly dull adult. Allow your tweens or adolescents to choose their own items if they are resisting keeping to some fundamental, routine hygiene measures. It’s possible that hygiene items tailored to them or with interesting smells will appeal to them more than your jug of Dove body wash for sensitive skin.
Do it for them if they don’t want to make a big deal about going to the store to pick anything out. Inquire if they have a favorite brand or smell, and if they don’t, inquire of a store staff.
Which items are most popular among teenagers? You may also consult their physician for specialized advice, especially if they have acne, oily skin, or dry skin.
When you go home, don’t make a big deal about your purchases in front of the whole family. Put their items in an easily accessible (and difficult-to-miss) location to serve as a visual reminder to utilize them.
Finally, try to avoid a power struggle over this; the more you press them to clean up, the more they will rebel. Continue to encourage them and model appropriate hygiene habits for them, and they’ll ultimately get the hang of it.
How to Discuss Puberty with Your Child
Puberty may be a period of inquiries, anxieties, and comparisons for every youngster, regardless of when they reach the age of puberty.
“Why am I still squeaking while Ethan’s voice has already dropped?”
“When am I going to receive my period?”
“When do you think I’ll be able to start shaving?”
Early puberty, on the other hand, maybe very nerve-wracking. Being the first in a peer group to go through something, especially something as perplexing as puberty, is never easy.
The consequences can be more serious than moderate distress.
The American Academy of Pediatrics conducted a research in 2018 that revealed that girls who reached puberty earlier than their classmates had a greater risk of mental health disorders, such as depression, and that these issues can continue into adulthood.
Parents, too, might suffer from anxiety,
according to Kelsey Torgerson Dunn, a child and adolescent anxiety expert at Compassionate Counseling in St. Louis
How can I effectively communicate with my child about the changes of puberty taking place in their bodies?
It may appear to be simpler to skip the conversation altogether rather than risk making a mistake.
“The point is, there’s no such thing as a bad way to start a discussion,”
“I recommend that parents begin by questioning their children about what they already know or have heard about puberty. This offers them a chance to clear up any misconceptions and make sure they’re covering all of the bases.”
Dunn believes it’s especially useful to go through the “Private Parts Rules” with a younger child when talking about puberty:
- It is forbidden to touch other people’s private areas.
- No peering at other people’s intimate areas.
- Do not expose your intimate parts to others.
- No acting or talking in a “grown-up” manner that makes others uncomfortable.
- Touching your own private parts is OK as long as it is done in secret and does not take too long.
Dunn reminds that when children get older, families may decide to revisit the topic.
“This is a fantastic chance for parents to have a conversation with their pre-teens.”
‘When is your child old enough to date, get kissed, or participate in sexual contact behaviors?’ you might inquire as a family. What are their opinions on the proper age ranges for these activities? Why?’”
When girls reach puberty before the age of eight, and boys before the age of nine, this is known as “precocious puberty.” If your girl begins puberty at the age of five, she may not get her first period until second grade. Because they stop developing at a younger age than their contemporaries, boys who undergo early puberty may grow up to be shorter than their classmates. This may cause them to be concerned about attending high school while still appearing like a little kid.
Hormone treatment can assist in these more severe instances. Pediatric endocrinologists at Rush University Medical Center in Chicago might recommend therapy to delay puberty in children who develop too early: the youngster would receive injections every three months or a yearly implant.
What matters is that you keep your youngster informed.
“Explain that these changes are common for older adolescents and teens,” Rush advises, “but his or her body is growing at a different pace.”
Louise Greenspan, a pediatric endocrinologist at Kaiser Permanente in San Francisco, recommends discussing sexual development with children as early as age 6 or 7.
“starting the talk while kids are young and keeping lines of communication open can help make the transition less scary.”
Recognize any discomfort and explain why continuous discussions about puberty and sexual development are so essential.
Puberty necessitates the same good parenting qualities as every other stage of life
being emotionally accessible to children at developmental milestones, seeing their growing pains, and offering comfort when life throws them curveballs…
This type of parental care, according to scientific data, helps children develop emotional resilience, which benefits their health and relationships for years to come.
So the objective isn’t to know everything; the point is to be there for them.